What I Would Tell My Daughter if I Had Onefeatured

I have been lucky enough to have many mentors, coaches, and bosses who have pushed me throughout my life. I am who I am because of my strong and loving foundation, without it I would have been lost for longer than I was when I was.

While I do believe that you can do anything you want if you just believe it and work hard enough, I also believe that the negative little voice within each one of us is alive and well for our entire lifetime.

You know what I am talking about, that little nagging voice that tells you that you will never be good enough, smart enough, meaningful enough. The one that tells you that you are stupid for even trying when you fall hard on your butt.

I have done enough inner work to know that you and I will always be enough just as we are in our beautifully flaw-filled human form. I also know that my many transformations were rooted in the belief that I could, at any time in my life, decide I wanted to shed old belief systems and create brand new ones that would better serve me and my desired path.

Growing up, I think I was pushed in a way that made me feel afraid to fail, in a way that made it okay to pretend everything was okay when in reality I was feeling unsupported, alone, unloveable, and inadequate. I don’t blame anyone. I think that tiny little voice inside of me was a little louder then, I think it fed off what it saw happening around it and it was amuck.

If I had a daughter right now I would tell her what my trainer at the gym told our entire group fitness class the other day.

I didn’t expect the words she was screaming on the microphone in the middle of our high-intensity workout circuit on a random Tuesday to strike me so deeply.

She said…

“It is MY job to push you, it is YOUR job to honor yourself. Whatever that looks like for you tonight, go with that.”

I have trained for over 10 years. I have had many coaches, one of my favorite Crossfit coaches would do just what she said through his actions, but she is the only one who has articulated it so beautifully on a Tuesday.

It wasn’t just my body that felt the impact, my entire soul regurgitated it and my heart was so inspired it could burst.

What was even more surprising about her saying this was how easily it rolled off her tongue. Maybe she had someone say that to her in the past, maybe she had said it a thousand times to herself or her classes before, or maybe she had simply read it in a book that same morning. I will never know.

If I had a daughter I would push her to always give it her all and I would repeat those words to her over and over again: “My job is to push you. Your job is to honor yourself.”

Are these not the words every great mentor should say?

So next time that mean little voice inside your head wants to tell you that you are not enough, remind yourself that that voice is meant to help push you but it doesn’t necessarily serve the purpose of honoring you.

It is your job to quiet it down enough so that you are able to honor yourself exactly where you are, honor what you are capable of, and honor how far you can and want to go in this very moment.

Somedays showing up is enough, other days not showing up to something is the best thing you can do for yourself. The point is to continue showing for yourself and meeting yourself exactly where you are in the present moment… no matter what the voices around you or inside of you are saying.

Love Deeply and Forever,