Why People Talk About Youfeatured

As a kid, I was always talked about. I was tall and awkward so I guess that’s no surprise. I could hear the whispers and they often got back to me and made me cry. I never fit in, but I am not special. Many kids feel like outcasts growing up and there’s no real way around that.

As an adult, it still happens. People still talk about me. I recognize this. They say if you are talking about someone then they are for sure talking about you. I used to get sad about this. I used to try to fight it. I used to think, “Life is just not fair.” But I now have no care. Sure, it would be so much more awesome if people talked shit to my face but life doesn’t necessarily work that way.

There’s something to be said about bonding over gossip. If two people dislike the same person it can be easy to connect on that superficial level. Just like people can connect with things they like, I truly believe they connect even deeper with things or people they thoroughly dislike. I mean, it is obviously easier to talk about others than to look deep within yourself to see what is really bothering you.

The more I hear people “talk,” the more I realize the words people say are direct representations of themselves. Whether or not they say it directly, talking about others could really mean you are just talking about yourself. Think about it. Why don’t you like Joe at church? You might say, “He talks too much.” Could it be possible that you, yourself, feel you talk too much or have been told by someone else to listen more and talk less? Food for thought.

I am a human so I am not here to say I never do it. I catch myself doing it and take a few steps back to take a look at myself every time. I would like to think I am a decent person, but who really knows, right?

I do know I try my best to curb the talk. Regardless of my efforts, people will always talk as will I. The main thing to remember is to always respect those around you. Whether or not you can’t stand the way someone says “K” or how they repeatedly use “UM,” it is important to keep the chatter to a minimum and keep on your own personal journey. Tables constantly turn and you never know when that person you talked about last week will provide you a kind gesture. Talk about insta-guilt.

Next time you feel like talking about someone else take a moment to think about who you are and where you are in life. Why is this person bugging you? Could it be that they remind you of a younger version of yourself? Could it be that you feel they are more skilled than you? Could it be that you dated someone similar? Could it be that they remind you of someone who hurt you in the past?

I always find there is a reason for the talk. What would be even better is if we could catch ourselves before the words even escaped our mouths. What we find repulsive in others is often what we find repulsive in ourselves. There is just no way around it.

Every human is pretty similar to the next and that is what makes life so beautiful. Rather than connect with others through gossip let’s make it our mission to connect with others through love, passion, dedication, and our eagerness to constantly grow and evolve.

Love Deeply and Forever,

Karen

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