Why Starting Something New Can Be So Uncomfortablefeatured

I have never felt like I really fit in anywhere. Hence why I am a writer. I have always felt a little uncomfortable in my own skin. Sometimes this feeling shows up stronger than other times but I have learned to deal with it for the most part.

No matter how awkward I am in general, I usually find ways to feel a sense of belonging within a group, a community, a clan. I am highly adaptable and for that I am thankful. But we don’t live in comfort forever. Life is full of obstacles and moments in which we are tested beyond what we ever thought possible.

Taking on new challenges in life can leave us susceptible to the most uncomfortable of situations.

Being the newbie in town can leave us feeling lost, wondering which way is up, all the while questioning who we really are….or were…. or want to be from this point on.

I feel out of my element in every aspect of my life right now. That’s because I have let go of everything I used to know and replaced it with what I felt my life was lacking.

I’m finding trouble adapting as I usually do. I’m finding it hard to look in the mirror and define the person that I am rather than the things that I have done. I know this is just a season, but this season feels like it’s lasting forever. This season seems more difficult than most.

I am never a victim of my own choices, this I know for sure. But taking leaps of faith into the unknown will always cause great pain and discomfort.

I knew that before I took my greatest of leaps. I have always known this. But I also know that a life without change is death by stagnation. And that’s not what I want for myself.

New places, things, opportunities, people, systems, processes, and cultures can be hard to navigate. That’s because your hardwiring your mind to think in an entirely different way, and this new way can cause anxiety because it leads to the unknown. Where you’re headed has yet to be defined and placed in an organized box within your mind, your institution, your normal.

Leaving old habits and routines behind requires a mourning process and it’s not until that cycle is complete that one can create a new normal.

I am aware that I am smack dab in the middle of mourning.

A part of me is refusing to let go of who I once was. But it’s not until I overcome this that I can move forward and be comfortable and confident in the choices that I have made.

So much of me wants to revert to the comfortable space I used to live in yet so much more of me knows that is not the path to growth.

So, yes, new beginnings can be extremely awkward and uncomfortable…especially when you’re already awkward and uncomfortable in the first place. And that’s okay. That means a greater version of you is on it’s way.

Until then all you can do is embrace the discomfort, the moment of not knowing exactly what comes next and be confident that your strength and resilience will carry you through. Because without these uneasy moments you would be the same person you were yesterday. And if that were the case what would be the point of living another day anyway?

Love Deeply and Forever,

Karen