Will You Still Love Me When I Am No Longer Young and Beautiful?featured
I am not a “10.” I ain’t gonna lie. I have wide hips, blemishes, stretch marks, cellulite, the whole nine yards. I have a side of my smile that creases harder than the other. I have split ends. I have it all. I don’t think I am perfect, do you?
I sat with someone and asked, “Why are we only physically beautiful for so long in life?” They said it’s because our body is like a car that deteriorates with time, it’s all just part of the normal wear and tear process.
Okay, fine… there’s a logic behind this statement. My body is merely a vessel I use to navigate through this physical world. But I am not going to lie. I am not a 10, but I am not ugly. I have used my looks to my advantage. Sometimes I smile a little wider to get that extra discount. Sometimes I bat my eyelashes so I can get that freebie. I know it’s wrong, but I still do it.
So what will happen when all the looks fade? Will I still be able to bat my eyelashes without my eyes drying out? Will I still be able to get away with murder because of my pretty dress?
Maybe not.
When I get old, people will not look at me the same way they do today but I contend to command a room regardless. I hope people look at me and wonder where all my wisdom comes from. I hope people look up to me like I am a teacher they hope to someday emulate.
They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder. The older I get, the more I believe this.
Will I one day miss my smooth skin? Maybe? Will I one day not be able to lift over 255 pounds during my workout? Most likely. Will my knees start to hurt with every step I take? At some point, I am sure.
Even though I know aging is inevitable and looks surely do fade, I know beauty is forever. I have seen women in power be beautiful at their oldest. I have seen old ladies walk into a room and make everyone stop and stare at them. Not because they are young, not because they are slender, but because of the way they shine from within. It is because life has taught them that there is so much more to treasure on this earth than physical looks.
I still get depressed some days. I get angry at the new frown lines coming in. I rip out any hair that looks slightly gray. I put on lotions and potions just like mama said. I workout to delay the aging process. I am even looking into Botox during my 20s.
When I get lost in these superficial spirals, I remind myself that I am beyond intelligent. I remind myself that I am a force. I remind myself that I have overcome serious shit no one my age should ever have to.
When I start fearing old age, I take one serious look at myself and my ugly thoughts. The only thing that will not serve me are these thoughts about physical “beauty.” This idea that society has helped nurture within my mind. But you know what my heart says? It tells me to “Stop being so jaded, beauty is from within and much more powerful than you can ever imagine.”
It’s true. I tend to focus on my face when something else is going wrong in my life. I tend to get obsessed with my weight when it seems there is nothing else I can control. Negative thoughts cloud my mind when things do not go as planned.
People will still love to interact with me when I am 80. I will keep on smiling the way I do today. People will still love me because I have an open heart and mind. People will still love me because I have been through hell and back and I still manage to stay positive. People will still love me because I am honest and I do my best to stay mindful of other people’s feelings and situations. People will always love me and I will always love people.
The real question is: Will you still love yourself when you’re no longer young and beautiful?
Love Deeply and Forever,
Karen
Copyright protected by Digiprove © 2018 Karen PierikAbout the author
